Ever imagine Your life without Jesus? I had this one dream and its still haunts me once in a while. It happened a while back and somehow I just felt like writing it down when I am suppose to be preparing for my finals. Lets just pretend my finals is not happening in 3 days time. =D
Anyways, I had this dream of what my life would be without Christ. Like literally not knowing who is this God everybody is talking about. I woke up immediately, feeling my heart beating really fast and I told myself and God that I do not ever want to think about it again. This split second thought really does scares me. But come to think about it, it made me realized that I cannot live without Him. I needed Him more than anybody or anything else in this world. I have lost many people throughout the years and its sad but not as devastating as not having Him in my life. He is the answer to my every though and prayers, He is my guide, my Personal Planner- Life Planner to be exact and without Him and His plans, I am nothing but the dust in the wind. Without Him, I am as good as a dead person.
I do not know about You guys, but I did thought about what would my life be without a religion, like just becoming a free thinker- well the word already speaks for itself as I will be more free in a sense where I do not have to go to church every week or follow any religious law but after having that split second dream, I felt more blessed than ever to be born and brought up as a Catholic. I always Thank the Lord that I do not have to go through many years of being lost in another religion like the converts. No doubt, I always respected the people whom was brought up in a family of different religion and decides to accept Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior after some time. This tells me that God works in mysterious ways- ways which no human being can ever expect and that is what make Him so special and wonderful at the same time. Too bad for those who does not like surprises because my God is full of surprises.
How God transformed people and from their testimony, others are transformed as well. Sometimes I feel that cradle Catholics including myself take this privilege that we are blessed to be born as Catholic for granted and that converted Catholics are more alive compared to cradle Catholics. Maybe because they know how it feels like to be lost once and was found by Jesus after that. The afford they put in to wanting to know who is this God and the yearning to receive His love and miracles does make me questioned myself sometimes. Never the less, this encourages me to push myself to know Him more, starting with the Word. I also use to feel envious when I hear of the wonders that God did in other people's life and constantly questioned God on why isn't my prayer been answered. After sometime, I realized that its not about God, its about me. He already answered my prayer. Infact, He gave me the best- its just that I forget about it and that the problem. Many do not remember the victories and 'presents' that God give us but only our burdens and problems in life.
That is why I started writing down all the wonderful things that happened in my life and every time I read it back, the problems I am facing are nothing because if He can walk with me through all the tough times before, He can walk with me through any other problems faced. If I can experience Him in a most magical way, so can anyone of You, even the sinners. We just got to say 'Yes' to Him. We just got to keep in mind that God knows when is the right time to give us what we need and desires. He knows us better than we know ourselves. We just got to know that He will never abandon us whereas He will always be there waiting for us to come back to Him. We just got to be very faithful, patient and positive. Pray and believe and He will do the rest. I trust in my God. Having Him in my life is the best thing I can ever have. How about you?
So yes, coming back to the main point, your scariest thought should be what if God suddenly decides to abandon you... Have a goodnight people. <3
